Where my Feet have Trod

In 2006,while at Mission Beach in San Deigo,Ca,I snapped a pic of my feet in the water.I took this shot to prove to myself and everyone else Id been in the Pacific.I was there with my 80 something great Uncle and he didn't walk out to the water with me.So I took off shoes and socks and ran right in.My how exhilarating.It was cold,and windy and Feb .But it was GREAT.then later on that trip my brothers friend took one of me on Rocks in Palm Springs,the main thing you see is the bottom of my tennis shoes.I called that My self discovery trip.I started something woth that feet pic.Two of my girlfirends who had come out of similar sitations took similar trips.The whole leaving your bad vibes away from home thing.One of them took pics of her feet in the Gulf Of Mexico.The other took barefooted pics in SNOW in CO.I think those moments we left bad stuff in far away places and came home better women.Stronger women.Now when I travel I take barefooted feet pics.It lets me see where my feet can take me if I put my mind to it.Ive started something with other firends when they travel too.I know groups who have their things they do.A cousin takes a monkey with her that gets passed around,another collects shot glasses,but me and my friends take barefooted pics.The Philly trip was the most difficult sine I was wearing tennis shoes and socks and it was spitting snow,so my feet froze,but it was worth it.Feeling my bare feet on the steps of Independance hall was a feeling I will always remeber and it made me feel glad to be an AMerican.Sappy crap sounding I know,but Its MY memory.I walked where our nation was born and brave men commited treason.To me it was Biblical Awesome.Now where I go feet pics are snapped.I have long,somewhat mannish feet and now I have a flower tatoo,But the symoblism is the same.I remind myself where my feet have trod and the great life I have.

Jake and Levi

GOd gave me 2 boys to be a Mama to.He gave them to me and I adore them.Jake is 7 and is my mini me.though he looks a bit like my exhusband he is all me in the personality dept.I was a single mom to him from basically birth.Though my family lived closer to me,as did my ex family{I hate calling them that cuz to me we will always be family,exhusband exlcuded of cource}.So there were always babysitters.I didnt have to share him with anyone on a daily basis.I had to be mom and Dad.Had to comend and condem.I know in todays time its not cool to spank your kids,but I do.Though it is not the answer for every crime,it get the point across when you need it to.I hate child abusers,b/c there is a line you do not cross.Anyway.Jake is one of the funniest,smartest,enthususatic children you will ever meet.He and I grew up together,since I had him when I was 19.THe day he was born my Mom became the smartest person I knew.Since kids dont come with intruction Manuals,Dr.Spock be damed.ANd honestly my biggest suprise about motherhood was that you couldnt send them home.They were there and you had to figure out what they were screaming at you.With Levi,its been easier on some levels b/c Ive done the sleepless nights,diaper changes,and breast and bottle feedings.But Levi is his own person.Hes my wide open child and Jake has an old soul.Jake has done some silly things in his 7 years.He swallowed a quarter once when his preschool teacher told him to put it up.We had to wait it out and give him prune juice.Hes had 3 sets of stiches.My comments to him when he yelps in pain is,Are ya bleeding?Most of the time he is,poor kid.Hes red headed and wears glasses.to some kids theyd get picked on for that,but not my Jake.He embraces it and uses his charm he gets from both me and the ex to sweet talk.He has 3 girlfirends,some of them dont even know theyre his girlfriends.He peed on the play ground at preschool,and in the front flower beds of the college I was attending while I was talking to the Dean.Kids will embarass the shit out of you!Then there is Levi,my 1 year old.I felt him move at 14 weeks and knew Id have my hands full.He talked early,but not as early as Jake,walked early and loves playing in the toilet.He has a temper and his cry is literally WhaaaaWhaaa.Neil and I got a kick out of that sound at the hospital.Not so much any more.Levi has only been to the ER one time so far and thats when I cut his finger while cutting his fingernails and freaked out.HE always has a bump on his made of cast iron head.B/c he thinks hes a big as Jake and wants to do everything he does.Levi will tell you nono by shaking his head.Hes done it since before he could talk,but he got his point across.Its still very cute!I was 25 when he was born and shortly afterwards I had my tubes tied.I birthed my limit and though I dont mind keeping my friends kiddos,Im glad I cant have anymore.Id rather finally go to Europe after Levi graduates high school.jake and Levi,despite the age gap,since I changed husbands are best buds.When Jake is gone to Nana's or Memaws Levi wanders around the house looking for him.I love my boys and thank God for them every day.

Where do Brusies Come From?

Im Writting on a fonkey green color to coinside with the subject at hand.Brusies.You know tose softball size ones that are purple and green and blue? Those marks that just appear on your body and the only expliantion you have for them is that little green men come in and beat on you in your sleep.Those bruises that are painful and most of the time youre not even aware they exist except when your looking and slef loathing at your fat in the mirror in that time between the bathroom and Jammies.Case in point,Samantha,a friend of mine came over a few days ago with what looked like Taladega after the race on her leg.She had a streaking black,blue mass running down her boney leg.I asked how she got such a horrible mark,thinking her husband had come up with some sexual torturing.Theyre freaks so I wasnt sure,lol.She said she didnt know HOW shed gotten it,but noticed it when she crossed her feet under her chair at the kitchen table and whacked it.Owwww,pain!I told her if she had more padding on her legs that shed not bruise so bad.Always one to eat my words,God knew what he was doing giving me a size 11 foot,b/c my mouth would ever be plenty big to fit it,I now have a mysterious bruise on my ass.Yesterday it was itching like Id been eaten up with skeeters again.{gotta love the south and our bat size pest}.Last night between the bathroom and jammies I noticed a huge one on my hail damaged ass.Its big and purple and painful.I sit on it all the time,as to protect my biggest body part,besides my mouth,so how did I get such a mark?I thought of the things Id done over the weekend,and I dont recollect getting shot at gun school.Neil and I had a heated session on the floor at his folks,but no hard grasping was involved.Just quiet,try not to get caught by them or the kids,so nothing there.So as it stands now I have a similar bruise on my butt that not only still itches,but hurts like hell when I sit the wrong way,and like I said I sit a lot!

Fat Women Dont wear Belts

So I learned a valuable lesson yesterday.I realized why I havent worn a belt in in years.I have too much junk in my trunk,abs,and sides to need one.I wear shirts that cover up my waist,adn thus the fold over from the top of my jeans so no one can see.Neil and I took a class yesterday with his dad to get our concealed carry permits.That way we can legally carry a gun on our person.the attire requirements were to wear something comfy and a belt.to me thats a conflict of interest,cuz a belt on a big woman just aint my idea of comfy.We had to stop at a local Walmart and buy me one.A sturdy one non the less,not the cute fabric pointless things that are the current vouge.I had to buy a HUGE belt to wear around my middle to hold my .38 holster on.I already have a bladder the size of a Walnut,and intentionaly squishing it was not my idea of a good time.I had to pee like 10 times over the cource of a few hours.My body was in revolt,what the heck was I doing to it,squishing and confining it thte way I was!?I like to let my fat roll flop over and when I stand up in my just belwo the waist jeans I let gravity to its dang job,let everything fall where it may.I sat there in a small calssroom with other people breathing my air figeting all day.Though I didnt talk much,as to not embarass Neil with all the stupid questions I had going thorugh my mind,but I wiggled like I had ants in my pants.He kept telling me to be still.I told him I couldnt.the dam belt kept irriataitng me to no end and my bladder was in full on rebellion.How could I sit still when i was in comfortable?But none the less I behaved and shot acuratly enough to pass the class,go me.But I was sitting beside the Valedictorian and Salutatorian of the class.Neil shot 100% ont he range and I brought up the rear with a 76% accuracy.But he was shooting his semi auto and I had my trustly revolver he had given me as a wedding gift.But I guess now he knows if good and pissed off theres a 76% chance Im gonna hit what ever I aim at.belt and all.If i could have shot barefooted and belt less Id have gotten at least 90%.I cant think with shoes on either! So the moral of the story is I can't remeber when I stopped wearing a belt,but I sure know the hell why!

Friends..Such good friends

This morning Im talking to my best friend,Crystal,{besides Neil,of cource}.Shes sitting on her porch drinking coffee and Im sitting on the patio drinking coffee and we miss each other.We're both smoking our morning Marlboros,and gossiping about home folks and even folks from here.She and I go way back to 3rd grade for me and 2nd for her.I was a grade ahead of her and we are 5 months apart in age.We've done some crazy shit in our day.We walked from her house to my house in tha dark and ice one night cuz it started sleeting and her Mama said she had to come home.I was scared to deathe the cyotes was gonna eat me.She protected me and laughed at me the whole time.But we made it.We've been through marriages,babies,boyfriends,wild and crazy nights where we woke up still drunk,and now new husbands.We've been apart,we've been toghether and we've been stoned too many times to count.We've had our good ole times and slept with the same people,just not at the same time,except that one time.But she was really too drunk to remember.lol.We made it through my parnets divorce and her Mamas stroke.We've fought for weeks and cried for days.Ive been pissed at her and didnt know why and she apologised for whatever it was and we were good.Now we're in the same place in our life.We've got good men,and stable homes and yet we're still crazy.But thats what life is all about.We talk about getting old and living in the nursing home.Getting our grand kids to sneak us in some green stuff,after we either kill our husbands or they die.Whatever comes first.We know our ups and downs have made us stronger not only as women but as the best of friends.No matter what happens.We know there will be more ups and downs but since we've been there and done that shit we know can and will make it through.GOd gave us each other,and she is my sister I love her a bunch.

Not awake yet

First off let me say that this morning i have a benadryl hangover.I may be a large woman,but Im a light weight when it comes to meds,except when I had my tubes tied.ANyway.The skeeters the night beofre made me an all you can drink buffett and I was scratching like the guy in GWTW who told Ms. Scarlett that "these animills is making me crazy".SO even Neil's strong coffee this AM aint helping.
Yesterday afternoon Neil decides he wants to go to Jackson to look at gun Holsters at Gander Mt.its an outdoor store.Did I mention hes a gun person?I am too,but I like them on looks,he like them for power,so like any other deep southernor,we have an arsenal.ANd he needed tennis shoes,other parts of the country call them sneakers or trianers,round here,if iut ties and says Nike,New Balance or my choice Saucony,their tennis shoes.So I said fine,but I got to pick the place where we ate.Jackson is civilazation to me,even though its 40 minutes from us.So we get Him his man stuff and I say I wans Japanese food.I may live in PoDunkville Tn,but Im a foodie.
Neil was skeptical and Jake was excited,Levi,who just turned 1 was jsut HONGREY.Neil had never eaten hibachi beofre,but Jake has and he loves it.Suprisingly Neil liked it.He is not a picky eater by any means,he jsut aint been out too much.lol.I dont know if many other men are like this,but Neil is an eater and a shitter.As in he poos like 5 minutes after he eats.So on the way home he said ,"Ya know I like Japanese food,it dont run through me like other stuff,normally Id be having the shit crapms bout now and be huntiung for a place to go,or telling you to floor it."I bout ran off the road laughing at him.I had to learn yesterday how he gets the urge to poo.He explained how his belly starts cramping,and I told him I didnt get that much warning.I had to go,NOW when the urge hit.We've been together about 2 1/2 years and married a 1 1/2 years,and I guess theres still stuff we're learning.Wed been having a deep discussion about our marriage and how we can improve it.Its good,but we want it freaking Awesome,So we had been talking about ways to do that.Then out of the blue he pops out with shit cramps.To me Im married to a funny man!As in he cracks me up all the time with his dry,sarcastic one liners.Yesterday ranks near the top.
That is all for today!

First Time for everything

GOod Morning,
So Im starting this blog as a way to clear my head.If anyone else reads it and can relate,well then There ya go.Forst off,Im Sarah.Im married to Neil,and we have Jake and Levi,{names have been changed,lol}.Im almost 27 years old,and I always wanted to be famous.Not so much anymore.Im a smoker,5'7",and 50lbs overweight.My kids are little,and Im a stay at home mom.I freaking hate to clean!But love to cook.Im from a small town in N.Ms that aint so small anymore,but now I live in an even smaller town in N.W. TN.{not been changed}.My brain goes fast than my marlboro held fingers so I cant type.I got inspired to write when my brain woke up beofore my body did.Thank God for coffee and a few of piece and quiet before the monsters awake.and wireless internet,so I can sit on the back patio and enjoy said coffee and Marlboros.I litterally found myself when I was 24 and in Cali,at my brothers.My life changed after that trip,but ill go more into that later.I grew up out in the country on the lake and am a water rat.love to fish and swim,not so much on the water sports,as Im not coordinated at ALL!I love to write,and talk,and visit.Ive learned to appreciate the humor in everyday life and I hope pt convey that here.Why Im joining the rest of the world and starting a blog I have no clue,but I dont want to keep boring my myspace friends with details!I love to travel,adn I like to go places where the couch,floor,or as of recent,my friends son bunk bed to rest my head.GIve me a coke classic,pack of smokes and a full tank of gas and Ill go anywhere,kids in tow,of cource.But it sure is nice to get away with out them too.Im independant and so is my husband and thats how we work,we are madly in love.that kind of love that makes people sick.We have 29 demetions of compatibilty.But Ill get into that later.Get the Neil refrence already.Ok,I guess thats enough of an intro into kinda who I am,but wait theres more......