Mere Mortal Men

Why do men have to be, well MEN? Why cant they just read our minds when we need them too? The day we need them to be HE-MEN, theyre teddy bears, the day we need teddy bears, they want to slay the dragon? How come when they finally seem to listen to us, its applied at totally the wrong time? I hate the word Metro Sexual. Come on! Either be a REAL Man or be an effiminate gay man. I have no problems with either of those sterotypes. But the ones who are confused just irk me.
Take my husband. He's more in the He-Man category. He works hard, wears camo and drinks budweiser out of a can. He has a short hair cut and has grease under his finger nails. To me, thats the kind of man I need. BUt on the other hand, hes not exactly Mr. Romantic either. he brings the obligitory birthday flowers and Valentines chocolates. But thats about it,in the woo me department. He showers regularly, snifs his pits before we go in public, but other than that I guess he's low maintence. But hes stubborn as a dam mule! He tells me one thing, and when I try to do just that, I need to take it easy. When Im a bum, he complains b/c the house isnt clean. COME ON, MAKE up your dam mind.Sometimes neither of us feel like we can win because our expectations are diffreent of each other at different times. Sometimes, on the flip side we try ot out nice each other,as I call it. He does something nice for me, when Ive already done it my way or vice versa. Same end result, just our diffrerent ways of doing things. Then mass confusion and yes sometimes an argument. I dont want a man who is always clean cut, but appreciates it when my husband cleans up for me. I dont want a sissy who cant bait his own hook, but appreciates it when he does it for me. But I do have the old fashioned gender role expectations. I expect him to take out the trash,play catch with the kids, and mow the yard. While, yes I am physically able to do those 3 things, I simply think its his job to do them. I dont expect him to cook supper and clean the toilets, or even throw a load of laundry on. But he can do them too. He and I try to work like a team. But we have defined roles in our team. I do the grocery shopping, he brings home the pay check. Im all liberated and what not,dont get me wrong. I was a single parent for years and had to fill ALL the roles. But now its nice to have someone to share them with me. Sometimes though we just get out of sinc, and it drives both of us to pitting against each other and causes a fight. I hate to fight {argue, we dont really knock down drag out fight}
Thats when you have to pick your battles. I had surgery recently 2 of them matter of fact. One having my gallbladder removed. I was very limited physiaically as to what I could do, and the other one, jsut a week ago was having a hiatal hernia fixed. Well, after a week afer my GB surgery, I felt like Josh expected me to be up and doing all my pre surgery activities. So I tried. Pain pills and all. and failed. So the house looked like 9 tornados hit it. Im still catching up of folding laundry from that. and I couldnt heavy lift,drive for at least a week,or vacum or mop. But this recent surgery was different. It didnt hurt near as bad, b/c there was no physical insicison. So I got hopped up on pain pills and was vacuming couch cushions at one in the morning. No lie. Ive had some SERIOUS spasms though in my throat. and this time I was taking the prescribed pain meds at the intervals the bottle prescribed as to not be in pain. Well, It hyped me up. {I DID NOT TAKE MORE THAN WAS PRESCRIBED!}but it gave me a false since of well being. So Ive been on a cleaning frenzy, much like a pregnant woman whos nesting. Well, yesterday I quit the pain meds cold turkey. I still have a wee left in the bottle and will only resort to them if the pain becomes unbarable. So far it has not. I still have to take valium to keep me relaxed,so the throat spasms dont get worse. that can delay the healing. Well, poor ole Josh was lfat out confused. Here I am, day 2 after surgery, up like a mad demon. and yesterday I crashed. BAD. I did nothing but lay around and throw a roast in the oven. I guess it would confuse anyone. Here I am right as rain,directly after surgery then bam, flat on my ass. So there was a fight this mroning about it at my house. He knows Im coming down off the pain meds and is trying to be paintent with me, but Im trying his Job like attitiude. We shall see what today brings. I just hope I dont say anymore nasty things to him that I did this morning,about him making up his mind about what I should or should not be doing.He loves me. I love him, and even when your crazy or diriving your spouse crazy sometimes thats what will get you through.