New Year, Better Sarah

So, I didnt really make any New Year resolutions. As I told my friends, didnt want to make a reso I didnt intend to keep. But I mentaly made a couple.
1. to be the best wife and mom I can be. Yelling less,and hugging more.
2. To be a better housekeeper. That begins today with a trip to Walmart for a Swiffer Duster thingie. The cob webs are taking over!
3. To continue to loose weight. Im beginning 2010 @ 188,give or take a tee shirt.
4. To pass the 6 hours I intend to take this semester.
5. to BE HAPPY and support my family and friends in whatever way they need me to.

So those arent too bad to keep I dont think. We rang in the new year right around here. WOund up having a small gathering with Joshes 2 of Joshes work friends and ones girlfriend. He and I danced in the kitchen,and under the Blue Moon. ANd he kissed me at Midnight like Ive never been kissed at that time before!!!

I hope this year will be a positive year for us around here. Maybe some finaical stablility, pay down some debt, Josh to enjoy his Men Weekends, me going on my cruise, Caleb turning 3 and potty training, and Nathan finishing 3rd grade with flying colors and maybe making All Stars in baseball this year. Who really knows. Im looking at this year as a fresh start. It was a hell of a decade for me, surviving my early 20's and growing into my now late 20's. I cant believe Ill be 30 next year. Holy Crap! Im still living the dream,though it has changed so much from that 18 year old girl I was ten years ago,to the 28 year old woman I am now. Ive learned alot,and as always theres more to learn. Im gonna ride along and see what happens,and Im sure at times,bucking along too. Some things wont change!

I want!

I want pot to be legal.
I want Josh to go to days! I all but begged him this morning! I told him this morning how hard yesterday was to keep the boys contained and quiet. and reminded him that summer was coming up,{ok,a strech,but still} and folks would be mowing their yards at noon and the kids would be in and out. It makes my life so much more stressful contantly having to say Be quiet Daddys asleep. uuuurrrrgggg!!!!! its really making me nutty lately. Its really never been a big deal,till now. but Caleb is getting more rowdy,and piss n moan more and more!!!!
I want it to be July already.
I want the mortgage company to make a decsion.
I want to move.
I want to scream!
I want to be a better mother.
I want my crows feet to go away,not keep growing.
I want my BMI to get below 29.
I want to be a better housekeeper.
I want to eat rotel dip and scoops and it not give me heartburn and ham size hips.
I want to jump out of a plane and scream like goofy.
I want to walk on the beaches of Normandy!
I want to skinny dip with Josh in broad daylight.
I want to be romanced and not in a pracitcal way.
I want to do what I want even if its not practical.
I want 9 West shoes!
I want a boob lift.
I want to take my family to Disney.
I want to win the lottery.
I want to never have to mop again!
I want electrolosis on my brows.
I want my greys to go away!
I want the US out of Iraq.
I want to look good in a 2 piece.
I want a maid.
I want to be free!!!

Battle Charmin

In marriage some good advice Ive been told is : Pick your Battles!

Yesterday a battle of wills began at our house, over toilet paper. Yes, its that time of year again where the 4 letter word SNOW is being mentioned on the news. So ever a good Suzy Homemaker, we needed toilet paper to "stock up for winter". Josh had to make a Walmart run, so I asked him to pick up a few extra things. Ever tryin to kill 2 birds with one stone, Ahhh, Im good like that, ya know. I asked him to get toilet paper,since we were down to 2 double rolls. Im paranoid to say the least about snow and wintery mix. {See other blog postings} There were a couple of other items on the list too,but none as important to rant about name branf vs store brand. Well after a while, my Walmart hunter man came home. With him he brought home the various items I asked him too, AND an econo package of CHARMIN t.p. I HATE charmin t.p. Not once in the almost 4 years of being a couple has he EVER seen Charmin in my possesion. I cant stand that brand. It sticks to you in various places, like a Q-Tip to nail polish. You know what Im talking about. Those stray strands of cotton, you tried to remove, but are stuck to your nails, until you remove the polish. Well to me and my parts, thats what Charmin does to me. Sure its soft and what not, but I never feel quite clean! SO when he came in with it, I kinda went a lil nutty. He said balistic, but I disagreed and told him, I had NOT gone ballistic, b/c I didnt throw anything. He conceded that point. So I ranted and raved! He offered to take it back! {good man, I tell ya} and this time I was MORE than willing to let him. Thats how much I hate it. THis super sized package had about 8 4 packs in it. BUT, before Josh could do some things on his honeydo yesterday, Caleb made quick work of opening the package. He had fun making a train track, castle, and a few other fort like things. So, crap! Point of no return on the TP. I know this sounds petty, but I dont buy but few "name brand" items.
They are:
Kraft mayo,
Kraft singles,
Jimmy Dean sausage,
a certian kind of creamy horse radish,
Kleenex tissues, and
Im sure there are more,but Ive only had one cup of coffee.

I normally buy the Dollar General, like Quilted Northern, T.p. and if Im at Walmart, for econo packs I buy Angel Soft. I mean,its not the John Wayne t.p. like Scotts, you know that single roll, industrial tp. I not only buy those brands b/c its what I prefer, but b/c normally they are more econmical. Unless theres a great deal on name brand items, generic rules the day here at my house. If a recipe calls for Eagle Brand milk, I use Great value, or some other discount brand. Ive not had one person who ate an item in it,say, hmmm,this taste generic!
I guess it comes down to the difference in men and women and how we shop. I think women want to take the time to compare numbers, that relate to the bottom line of our household budgets. Men simply want to get in and out of where ever their wives have sent them. {even if they were going there anyway!} Just this week I bought Caleb a 3 dollar, heavy, nice,can wear this year,and next, coat at a thrift store. J.C. Penny had a similar coat,but not near as thick for 25.00. I refused to spend that much. Call me a bad mom or whathave you for buying something like that at a thirft store, but when Caleb looks back at pictures of im in that coat,years from now, I hope the furthest thing from his mind, is ooooohhhhh, Mama bought that on the cheap!
So, pick your battles, and if that battle happens to be t.p. then by all means!!!

Our Squirrell N Dumplin's Story

Our Squirrel Story:
It begins in Oct. Of 2007. I was a new bride married to my HeMan.He had just come home from his semi annual hunting trip with his HeMan Woman haters club. The rest as they say,is history....

In Oct every year Josh goes hunting/camping with his best friends,that time of year is squirrell. {From now on will be refered to as S.} In April is the elusive Turkey. In OCt of 2007, after we had been married since Febuary, we were still in that honeymoon phase of our marriage. We were still trying to Out Nice each other.
When my fearless hunter returned from his trip, flithy,stinky ,blissfully happy at a fruitfull trip,I was glad to see his boy like grin permanatly planted on his face. Then he asked me to do something for him, Make S and Dumplin's. Still trying to be a good lil housewife, I heartily agreed. ,With one exception, I was not touching the damn things...IT WAS ALL DOWN HILL FROM THERE!
He brought the S's in, about 5,if memory serves. They were dressed.For those who arent familiar, they were cleaned and skinned,no tails and no heads {THANK GOD!} He brought them in a zippy bag and put them in the fridge. I was trepidatious to say the least,and had to figure out how I was gonna cook the Tree Rats,as I refer to them,then and now. Hmmm, so he went to bed to rest before having to work his night shift job...
About noon,since we normally eat about 5 or 5:30 pm when he works, I thought I'd best get the rats a cooking., Having never cooked one before, I had to think. Some foods are referred to as tating like chicken. Since an S looks like a squab I thought Id just cook them like a chicken. So I began my dutiful wife quest by filling up my large stock pot with water. Knowing I had to make dumplins later,I knew I'd need broth. Then I had a light bulb moment,as I like to refer to them. I'll use my tongs,as to not have to touch the rats! Genious that I am,ya know. So, I grabbed them one at a time with the tongs,and sprayed them off with the kitchen sprayer. YES,so far so good in not touching them! Into the pot they all went. I added some garlic,salt,pepper,and onion. Garlic makes anything taste good,right. So I thought what the hell,and added some more!
They began to boil and rumble on the stove. I had no idea when they would be done,and I sure as heck was NOT gonna taste them to see.I simmered them after the rolling boil about 2 hours. They smelled good, but had a distinct odor I could not place. Warm and hearty,but well, like a tree rat! Even the semi smell good scent wafting through my home still had not sold me on trying them.
Like most chicken n dumplins makers, I knew to remove the meat before adding the dumplin's. At this point my dumplins were a horrible work in progress.{still are at times,but I reconfigured how to make them,thanks to the Food TV's show "Down Home with the Neely's"} I made them like I rememeber Mama making them. {later when I asked her HOW she made hers so good and mine were not,she said she used Bisquick, DUH SARAH!} So I cut my shortening into my flour,added a dash of salt and added milk. Like a regular buiscuit. Fine,well,and good. I let them "set" on the counter after rolling them out and cutting them into squares with a pizza cutter. Then I brought the broth up to a rolling boil again,like I had always seen Mama do.Into the pot they went. glop,glop,glop. Some began to rise back to the top before the rest could be added. A sure sign I had done SOMETHING right...Oh I wish that had been the case. I unmasterfully began to stir the dumplin's,as they rose,to push them back down in hopes to cook even. Boy hidey was I wrong! When I assumed they were finished cooking, I put the lid on the pot. The way I could tell this was b/c the broth had thickend and there were still whole dumplins floating at the top! Sucess I thought! I then turned down the heat for a short simmer,about 30 minutes or so, stirring them every 5 minutes. Nothing worse than a pot of scortched dumplin's I thought! I noticed everytime I stirred the pot some of the dumplins were falling apart and the broth was getting thicker and thicker. Right on track! Then I began to make cornbread and fried okra. No dumplin meal is complete in Dixie without it,ya know?
Then when I assumed the umplins were done, the indication being the dumplins had turned into white glop with dollops of what looked like Daisy in it, I then retrieved my handy tongs and added the S's back to the hot bubbling cauldrun of doom!
When Josh awoke, he too smelled the wonderful scent of tree rat. Anxious to get up and eat my culinary triumph he quickly showered and made short order of coming to the stove. His eyes shinning,his mouth wattering,and happy as a pig in shit,that his wife was such a good cook! I stood near him as he added a big hunk of homemade buttermilk cornbread to his plate,slathered with soft butter. He grabbed my waist and kissed me,and said many thanks,baby.
Hmmm, I thought...Just wait! So he grabbed a big dipping spoon all anxious to gobble up the fruits of his weekend. And what do his wondering eyes does he dip out? Yep, A WHOLE S! He looked at me rather puzzled,and exclaimed I was supposed to pull the meat off the bones.
Nuh UH I replied. You asked me to cook them,I told you I was NOT touching the dam rats,and you didnt say nothing about taking the meat off the bones!
So a bit disgruntled,he pulled every last one of the now shrunk to the bones S's out of the pot and disasembled them.

Moral of the Story and light at the end of the tunnel : Make sure you tell your wife exactly what you want her to do with forgein varmit! And me, well, since then he's never asked me to make it again!

Only For Belynda!

Good Morning Ya'll. Last week, I realized I had NOTHING to wear to my Aunts funeral. Well,thanks to a friend and my Grandmother, I had a cute skirt and shirt to wear {see FB pics} at least I thought it was cute. But I had to wear panty hose, Oh those dreaded words. It was cold in South Ms for the first time in Oh forever.And With my pale legs the new stellar heels I bought {no body but my buddy who loaned me the skirt wears my size,so she loaned me sandals,me thinking it would be warm} I HAD to wear the dam things. So GM had a new pair she loaned me. Yall should have seen me doing the fat woman wiggle to get my queen size behind and hips into my GM's hose. I shimmed and shaked and got them on. Then OH THE PAIN! My cellulite was revolting. I assume it was missing its friends that have evaportated with the diet Im still on. So I went up stairs to grab my shoes. I was squatting and panting and just all around NOT comfortable. I kept telling myself this was Belynda's twisted revenge on me,and that SHE KNEW Id only wear not only a skirt for her but dam apnty hose too! Well, it was truly inevitable, AS I was squatting I heard a rip! AHHH, my inner thighs on one side could breathe again!!! But...the escape of one side of fat shifted then and the other side squeezed even tighter.SO tight it pinched me,and I shimmed some more. I tell yall what. Everyone there was roaring with laughter as I was Yosimite Sam fitting my dead Aunt. Well, after all the snarling and shaking, I ripped a huge hole in them. and those got tossed. Then GM gave me another pair,that I cut holes in BEFORE I even put them on. Fool Me once...kind of mentality. Well, I did the fat woman wiggle,shimmy,cuss, hiss,spit and shake, got them suckers on.{I will pause to say that my GM is the similar height as me,but I got my butt from Dad's side,as most women in my fam,including my lil sister are sticks. Im more volumpitous.SO length was not an issue. SUck em in size was!!!} Thats when I noticed the run in them!!! After all that repeat of the first pair,and me getting them on succesfully, They had to come off. BLAH!!!
So before we even went to the funeral home we had to stop at RIte AId for me to get some in Sarah size. But I didnt get the suck em in,squeeze you in like sausage in a casing. Nope I bought the cheapest ones they had there in size wide and long! Then upon entrance into the funeral home I had to go to the ladies room to slide them on! Only for Belynda I kept thinking!!! Fortunatly some soul had put a roll bench in the big stall for women with "tha vapa's". Bless who ever that was. I guess Belynda KNEW I was outta practice putting them things on,and had the celestial forethought to put a bug in someones ear once upon a time to put that roll bench in there just for my wide ass! So on the dreaded stockings went! They didnt cut off the circulation to my lower extrimaties either! Bless cheap pantyhose.
Then after the funeral we went touring around Vicksburg with my husband and friend Heather.We ate lunch in public, but I was already getting antsy and tired of the friction my thighs were creating.So after lunch we stopped at a river look out. I opened the dirver door adn right there front of God and everybody I did the fat woman shimmy and ripped them suckers off!!!!
THe END!!!

Mere Mortal Men

Why do men have to be, well MEN? Why cant they just read our minds when we need them too? The day we need them to be HE-MEN, theyre teddy bears, the day we need teddy bears, they want to slay the dragon? How come when they finally seem to listen to us, its applied at totally the wrong time? I hate the word Metro Sexual. Come on! Either be a REAL Man or be an effiminate gay man. I have no problems with either of those sterotypes. But the ones who are confused just irk me.
Take my husband. He's more in the He-Man category. He works hard, wears camo and drinks budweiser out of a can. He has a short hair cut and has grease under his finger nails. To me, thats the kind of man I need. BUt on the other hand, hes not exactly Mr. Romantic either. he brings the obligitory birthday flowers and Valentines chocolates. But thats about it,in the woo me department. He showers regularly, snifs his pits before we go in public, but other than that I guess he's low maintence. But hes stubborn as a dam mule! He tells me one thing, and when I try to do just that, I need to take it easy. When Im a bum, he complains b/c the house isnt clean. COME ON, MAKE up your dam mind.Sometimes neither of us feel like we can win because our expectations are diffreent of each other at different times. Sometimes, on the flip side we try ot out nice each other,as I call it. He does something nice for me, when Ive already done it my way or vice versa. Same end result, just our diffrerent ways of doing things. Then mass confusion and yes sometimes an argument. I dont want a man who is always clean cut, but appreciates it when my husband cleans up for me. I dont want a sissy who cant bait his own hook, but appreciates it when he does it for me. But I do have the old fashioned gender role expectations. I expect him to take out the trash,play catch with the kids, and mow the yard. While, yes I am physically able to do those 3 things, I simply think its his job to do them. I dont expect him to cook supper and clean the toilets, or even throw a load of laundry on. But he can do them too. He and I try to work like a team. But we have defined roles in our team. I do the grocery shopping, he brings home the pay check. Im all liberated and what not,dont get me wrong. I was a single parent for years and had to fill ALL the roles. But now its nice to have someone to share them with me. Sometimes though we just get out of sinc, and it drives both of us to pitting against each other and causes a fight. I hate to fight {argue, we dont really knock down drag out fight}
Thats when you have to pick your battles. I had surgery recently 2 of them matter of fact. One having my gallbladder removed. I was very limited physiaically as to what I could do, and the other one, jsut a week ago was having a hiatal hernia fixed. Well, after a week afer my GB surgery, I felt like Josh expected me to be up and doing all my pre surgery activities. So I tried. Pain pills and all. and failed. So the house looked like 9 tornados hit it. Im still catching up of folding laundry from that. and I couldnt heavy lift,drive for at least a week,or vacum or mop. But this recent surgery was different. It didnt hurt near as bad, b/c there was no physical insicison. So I got hopped up on pain pills and was vacuming couch cushions at one in the morning. No lie. Ive had some SERIOUS spasms though in my throat. and this time I was taking the prescribed pain meds at the intervals the bottle prescribed as to not be in pain. Well, It hyped me up. {I DID NOT TAKE MORE THAN WAS PRESCRIBED!}but it gave me a false since of well being. So Ive been on a cleaning frenzy, much like a pregnant woman whos nesting. Well, yesterday I quit the pain meds cold turkey. I still have a wee left in the bottle and will only resort to them if the pain becomes unbarable. So far it has not. I still have to take valium to keep me relaxed,so the throat spasms dont get worse. that can delay the healing. Well, poor ole Josh was lfat out confused. Here I am, day 2 after surgery, up like a mad demon. and yesterday I crashed. BAD. I did nothing but lay around and throw a roast in the oven. I guess it would confuse anyone. Here I am right as rain,directly after surgery then bam, flat on my ass. So there was a fight this mroning about it at my house. He knows Im coming down off the pain meds and is trying to be paintent with me, but Im trying his Job like attitiude. We shall see what today brings. I just hope I dont say anymore nasty things to him that I did this morning,about him making up his mind about what I should or should not be doing.He loves me. I love him, and even when your crazy or diriving your spouse crazy sometimes thats what will get you through.

New Blog

I have begun a new blog, on here talking about my tummy issues. I did have my gallbladder out on Sept. 14th. and on the 27th of Oct I will have another surgery to correct my hiatal hernia. Ive decided to write about that in a sepreate area, b/c its pretty long and borning for those who dont want to hear about it on here. Ill be adding more info as I go. But right now, today is just the start!